Cemalnur Sargut

Nazlı Hanım was the daughter of the Evrenos family from Istanbul. She was raised with a modern and civilized mentality. She was married to an Istanbul chalabi, Cemal Bey. She was also one of the caliphs of Kenan Rifai.

Nazlı Hanım bears within herself such a great love that it alone can purify not only her dirt but also that of almost the entire humanity. That is why she –without careful consideration, reflection or hesitation-- jumped into an endless horizon, selling both worlds for a penny. 

 

This elegant young lady, whose youth passed in an air of beauty and poetry, would enjoy various tastes of life such as wandering in Istanbul’s popular excursion spots, attending musical gatherings on the Bosphorus and keenly admiring natural tastes, but there was always something she was seeking as if blindfolded, gropingly trying to find an unknown. 

 

We come across a paragraph in one of her writings which can be considered as a good example of a literary text of her times, “Love… this word delves into pure and elegant depths of my spirit, illuminating the spiritual desires whose existence even I can’t feel. There was the deepest spot in my heart, which was empty. Neither glory and array nor the stars in the sky could fill in this emptiness. This spot was awaiting an entity, a love that could bring pleasure and peace to the finest particles of my existence. Only the brush of love could color my feelings and thoughts. O the Creator of Universe! Where is this love?”

 

Humans cannot exist merely by coming to this world. Such a birth consists of a temporary formation of an existence that has already been present, even everlasting. As things cannot come into being out of nothingness, they can only exist out of existence. But humans named this everlasting intangible entity as non-existence. 

 

Then where is this unseen existence?  Where is it? How can it be found or caught? How can one know it and adhere to it?  As everyone has assumed and accepted, being born out of a pleasure of one’s parents, giving the entrusted body back to its owner when it gets worn out and passing away were not what her mind would acknowledge. Yes, one can die, indeed, will die. But dying is a kind of life; a secret life whose conditions and laws cannot fit in everyone’s perception... As we are traveling from death to life back and forth, should we not adjust ourselves so that we can fulfill the responsibilities and duties required by this life? For people, existing isn’t respected enough or regarded as important since it is considered to be simple and natural. When asked, she would say that existing is an invaluable opportunity bestowed on Adam’s sons. That is why we should know why we exist as long as we live. We should especially know, seek and find the one who has brought us into existence and sacrifice our lives.  The longing for and the secret of pre-eternity were whispered to the ears of this young lady. None of the beauties of this world were able to steal her heart. In the midst of all the worldly blessings and ostentation, she was always all by herself in love with her love, awaiting her love, vigilant, infatuated and lonely. 

 

Her spirit was of an unadulterated nature. She had nude energy scattering fire, not taking this or that form, dissatisfied with the love of any created, not easily submitting to any order whatsoever just like the “forbidden fruit”. She was actually so incandescent like white heat that whoever touched her could burn and turn into ashes. Her heart was made to burn from pre-eternity to post-eternity. She couldn’t designate her heart to someone who is simply a human like her.

 

One can resemble this time of Nazlı Hanım’s state to a crude gem, so enriching and promising. But it is in such an intricate and risky well that no one can reach and benefit from it. Even she herself cannot find the treasure within or share it with anyone even though her most distinct characteristic is generosity. Giving both materialistically or spiritually is perhaps the most pleasing experience for her under this vault of heaven. 

 

She wants to give. But what could she give except for her materialistic possessions like khans? Her spiritual gold is not yet extracted from within the depths of her luminous heart, cut or made into golden coins so she isn’t able to give away anything yet.

 

One day we see this jewel purified and presented to everyone so that they can benefit from her. She now has a heart that isn’t influenced by any compliments or physical beauty. Under the guidance of Kenan Rifai and her mother, her competence is now self-disclosed.  After years go by, she says the following: “My life was just an imagination. My body was sick with dangerous microbes. Now my body is as fresh as a tree free from woodworm; my soul is enlivening; my spirit is high and blessed. Having drunk from the spring of bliss, my spirit is so much expanded that you can drink from it forever.”

 

Now she knows why she came to this world. She can very clearly see the good and the beauty. She is now more conscious in her aims. She loves people and opens the farthest corners of her heart to others’ sufferings. And people pay respect to this self-sacrificing and true-hearted lady.

The most remarkable side of Nazlı Hanım’s character is that she always gives priority to others and places herself in the background. Many times she becomes completely selfless.

 

But this exceptional lady was bestowed with the sufferings of love. She was thus blessed by losing all her fortune and led a life full of financial losses, which she wasn’t used to at all in her life. She explains this situation as such, “O Lord! Your beauty gives the lover such a charm that one abandons luxury and ease becoming content with suffering and hardship.”

 

In 1914 during the war, her husband was sick so he couldn’t work. They had three children. She also had her relatives setting their eyes on the property she inherited from her parents. For various reasons all her property faded away and she was left with a little income and her diploma, which eventually led her to become a primary school teacher. In this way Nazlı Hanım was actively involved in education working for 28 years surrounded by young learners. 

 

I would like to share with you an anecdote which is as weird as it is worthy of attention for it shows how rightly children perceive the most remarkable side of her character.  During the winter of 1949 an old woman who stayed at the same place with her and worked as a teacher passed away. After a few days, an old student of hers, Çetin Özkırım, who was then a young journalist, mistakenly thought that the lady who died was his former teacher, Nazlı Hanim. On October 6th, 1949, he wrote the following article in a newspaper called Bayram:

 

“My dear Teacher, Nazli

Even though we come to this world crying, we leave this world either crying or smiling. 

 

According to a claim, if people are going to hell they go with their eyes open and faces sad. If they are going to heaven, they go with their eyes closed and a sweet smile on their face. 

 

My dear Teacher, Nazli...

 

Most probably on the day she died, her face was framed with the sweetest of smiles. On her pure-white loving face, years of compassion and grace must have settled down. With her white hair, white face and white hands, she proved that white is the color of virtue. 

 

I was a child when I first got to know her. Twenty years ago, so young that when I insisted on not going to school, I was bribed with a candied apple.  

 

I first met with her in front of our school’s playground just opposite the Hirqa-i Sharif Mosque, when she was caressing my hair with her affectionate hands.   

 

I don’t know whether she was well-off or not. But it seemed to me that she was as rich as Croesus and her heart was as generous as a prophet. It occurred to me that the most pleasant moment in her life was when she caressed the hair of her students on the morning of Eid, or bayram. She would buy nice clothes for all her students who couldn’t afford them. She would also give 25-30 children some pocket money and fruits for the Eid. 

During the whole Eid, she would cook for the children at her place near the Hirqa-i Sharif Mosque. The rooms in her flat used to be full of joyful children. 

 

She wouldn’t deal with the children of rich families as much or at least that is how we felt. She would be so attentive to her poor children. There was uniformity in her class. All her students would have smiling faces and bright blissful eyes. 

 

I can’t forget this. Again on the morning of an Eid, 25-30 of us were guests at her place eating. There was a boy for whom she forgot to buy clothes the other day. When she realized him and his sadness, she became so upset. The other children were eating the sacrificed sheep’s meat singing songs together. Some had already finished their rice and meat and had their eyes on the dessert placed on the console. Nazlı Teacher silently went out of the room, grabbed a boy playing in the corridor who had a blue jacket and white pants on and took him to the room next door.  

 

A few minutes later, she came back with a blue jacket and white pants in her hands, approached the forgotten boy and dressed him up. The other boy whose clothes were taken was Nazli Teacher’s grandson. The forgotten boy was now happy and so was Nazli Teacher. 

 

Yes, I still don’t know whether she was rich or poor but there is one thing that I believe: I am sure that she is now at the highest rank of paradise with the highest spiritual wealth due to all the children whom she gave joy and happiness.”

 

This article is a very good testimony for Nazli Hanim. This great lady actually said the best words that can be said for herself: “I am responsible for serving the Master of my master and thus I benefit from my Love!”

By Samiha Ayverdi